During our time here in South Africa it has been a struggle simply to take a shower, it is a surprise if the pressure is more than a trickle, and to actually have warm water all the way through is considered a true blessing. Cold, quick showers fast became the norm, with everyone seeming to be fighting for the water at the same time nearly every day.
Around here, it is hard to let the ‘norm’ settle to some kind of a routine. The norm is going off on adventures almost by the day. Even though we are living in a sort of bubble, it is hard to think of any two days being the same.
In the past few weeks we have done so many things it is hard to keep track of when it all could have even fit in! We made our final visits to the service sites which we then signed up for. We spent a day at uShaka Sea world and water park, going from a Dolphin show - where I got to dance with one of the stars of the show! - to countless water slides, lunch with the group out in the parking lot, and then more slides before heading to a professional Rugby match between the Sharks and the Cheetahs. The guys all painted their stomachs and everyone put on some facial war paint in support of the Sharks - who ended up winning the match - and even though most of us had no idea what the game was really all about we cheered as loud as any of the other fans in the stands.
For our biology field trip this week we got to visit a local game reserve where we spent about an hour in a jeep driving along bouncy roads checking out the local ‘wildlife’ and hearing all about the life of our epic guide, Divon. We saw Giraffe, Zebra, Wildebeest, Warthog, Ostriches, Impala, a large number and variety of bird life, some turtles and even Rhinos! We heard about how Divon raised two leopards, used to steal Ostrich eggs that the mothers had kicked out of the nests - still a dangerous pursuit - and spent much of his life in the wilderness. He trained as a ranger and had to make several trips into the bush with a bottle of water and a knife and survive for a set period of time - sometimes while he was followed by ‘hunters’, forcing him to become stealthy, fast and silent, while trying to complete any of a number of objectives before getting caught. He also told us about many close encounters with the African animals as well as some which had tragic endings - including taking a newly wed couple out on some boats just two days after they had said their vows, they happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and one extremely territorial and dangerous Hippo wound up killing the new bride, right in front of the husband who was in the same boat. He talked about getting charged by lions, and how to interact with Black Rhinos (the more aggressive of the two kinds) and many other animals. He had a great deal of stories which had us all focused for the whole of the time that he was our guide. On the other side of that day, we got to plot grids and count grass...while more involved than it sounds, it is actually not as daunting as we had expected it to be.
Then, this weekend we spent Saturday doing a Canopy Tour of zip lining between 8 platforms, 7 lines in total. Speeding between the trees and taking in the incredible view on both sides as we came in and out of the canopy cover - long expanses of low rolling green hills to one side and a waterfall against a rock face to the other side. Going out for Ice cream when the day was done and then watching a movie with some of the group later in the evening was a good way to end off a great day.
Just so that you do not get to thinking that all we do is goof around, you should know that this coming week marks finals for us, and people are constantly working on papers and projects or studying while we are not out having the time of our lives...not to say that the learning has not been enjoyable, indeed it has been incredible. The opportunity to take classes in a place like the one we have been blessed to live in for the past month already makes even the seemingly mundane into a new experience. The knowledge that our professors have so willingly poured out to us is the kind that one hopes for in every class and only seldom finds. Personally, Life and Teachings has been one of the greatest courses so far, the fact that we are learning from a man who has so much life experience makes the lessons he teaches that much easier to listen to and at times I find myself unwilling to leave class when it is over.
After this next week is over we will be heading into the community to work with the service sites we have all signed up for. We will be working with the children, visiting people in their homes - including AIDS patients - and helping with building and other local needs, as well as getting to know the people and learning from them. The fact that we have been in a relatively ‘North American bubble’ here on campus up to this point makes the prospect of getting out and digging in very exciting. God is going to do big things in the hearts of each one of us, my prayer is that we would be open and receptive to it. Hearts are going to break, relationships are going to grow, assumptions will be shattered, and in the end, I am confident, hope will be sewn and restored. It has been my personal experience that God does not allow our hearts to break for the things that break His heart without giving us the promise of hope in the end.
On top of the adventure and the academic, I have had the wonderful opportunity to co-lead a D-group with Allie Schlafer. We have 11 in our group in total, including Allie and myself. We have been meeting three times a week, Monday evenings - when we go through a chapter of Romans, Wednesdays at dinner times where we share a time of just coming together in the middle of the week for support and overall good times and conversations, and Friday mornings before breakfast in the prayer chapel when we go through the minor prophets together. Keeping in mind that we are all relatively the same age, Allie and I have been working to be less like people who are ‘in charge’ to being facilitators of conversation, study and relationship. It has been an incredible blessing to be in this group with each of the other ladies in it, to hear about their lives and to work through some of the questions that come up during our times of Bible study has been challenging and rewarding. I look forward to continuing to get to know each of them. Prayer for our group would be greatly appreciated.
Prayer for prepared hearts and minds as we get into this week of finals, and as we ready ourselves to step out into the community would also be a huge blessing. Thank you all for prayers and support.
Until next time,
It never ceases to amaze me just how easy it is to point fingers at another culture in regards to areas of spiritual attack. Or, on the flip side, how much more personal and real a faith in Jesus Christ can be. It has been mentioned before, but I can’t help return to it, no matter where you go you will often see those who have much and those who have next to nothing. The north American dream of being happy when we have the next best thing or the newest gadget has so distorted our way of thinking, to such a degree that when we step outside our cozy lives and see people living with nothing but the clothes on their back we are shocked that they could have even the smallest amount of joy in their lives.
The idea mentioned in Luke 12: 15 is so contrary to the world’s way of thinking in many ways, that “a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions”. One of the most encouraging things that comes along with any journey outside the wealthy western mindset is the real and tangible joy that is shown among people - often total strangers - just because they share the most basic, yet incredible, of gifts, that is life!
But the rest of the world has become so bent on individualism, no longer thinking to share in the joy of simply being. There is so much blindness in that kind of pride. We neglect the ones who are in need, we forget the ones who have given so much of themselves because we like to think we made it on our own. I apologize if this inclusive-type language is throwing you off, maybe these things are more particular to me, maybe not.
And it is not just about the materialistic side of life, so many of us who call ourselves people of faith fall back on the same way of thinking. We call out to God in the hard times when the only option we have is to lean on Him. Then, after He has seen us faithfully through, we turn our backs on Him and try again to do it on our own. Inevitably this only leads us back to a place where our only option is to again call out to God. And in a strange sort of way, thank you Lord for those times, as painful and awful as they can be, for you use them to remind us of a very important lesson. We need you. Truly, we do. But I pray that cycle would be broken! That it does not take some terrible event to make a change for the better, rather that a change would be made simply for the joy of being closer to Christ!
We become blind to sins of habit, blind to temptations, blind to addictions, blind to envy, blind to pride. That pride, which keeps us from acknowledging our weaknesses and our needs, is so lethal. God would you root out the pride from among us, show me where my pride is keeping me from being all of who you want me to be!
God truly uses those who put themselves in a place to be used. Those who humble themselves and allow God to bring them through times of testing and trials, of painful rebuilding - when the pain of guilt and sin, and our desperate helplessness without God become so evidently clear that it can not be ignored, hidden or forgotten. Miracles can happen when people are willing to get to that place with Jesus. People are able to speak into the lives of friends and loved ones - not with fancy words or a prepared speech, but through daily actions in the smallest of things; broken relationships can be mended when we are able to put our hurt and indignation - our pride - out of the way and take that first step of reconciliation. Circumstances that would cause a great deal of fear and unrest in many people can be faced with a sure confidence that there is one who is above anything we may be facing, one who will see us through when we lean on and call out to Him. Personal brokenness, and darkness at the inner parts of our lives can burst with light and healing when we seek help, when we get over ourselves and acknowledge the fact that we can not do this life alone, that is not how we were created. We were created in the image of God who is the perfect image of real community, the Trinity.
Pride is about so much more than the physical things. There is spiritual pride - that thing that keeps us from reaching for help when we know we need it. There is a spiritual side to many things which many of us never really think about. Gluttony, envy, pride - and the rest of them; the fact that many of us never think about these things in these ways is part of what keeps us blind from the ways God wants to change us, to shape us and make us more into the selves He wants us to be.
These ideas and thoughts are not unique to myself, I have done a good deal of reading in the past year that has opened my eyes to a great deal of need and incompleteness in myself - without having faced those issues and dealt with them, rather than run from them and sweep them under the rug all over again, I don’t know where I would be now. Physically I would likely still be here in South Africa for the semester, but emotionally and spiritually I would be in such a different place. In the past, just like everyone else out there, I have struggled with sins that seemed routine, habits that I never really acknowledged as such. Things that would make me feel bad, plague my conscience for a while, then I would turn away - not dealing with it - and go on my way, not God’s way - which includes dealing with and shedding light on those dark areas.
Last semester it was a theme on campus to acknowledge those dark areas, it got very uncomfortable and I could not ignore it any more. No matter how far down you are able to burry something, it is never deep enough, through the eroding force of time and circumstances it will come up again. The only way through it is to deal with it head on. Something we are not meant to do alone.
Wondering why or even how God could continue to seek after such a lost and foolish people, struggling with how I could deal with the fact that I am prone to fall over and over again, so many other things were thoughts that took over my mind for the better part of a month. I don’t have the answers, but I know that God is above it all. The fact that His love is so big that it covers over a multitude of sins is staggering. But it is not just about hiding those sins. He sheds the light on them, and it is often painful, but it is so important in becoming the self that God has in mind for each of us to be. There is no other way.
Let me be the absolute last to say that I have any kind of majority of this walk with Christ figured out, because if there is one thing I have been made so sure of in the last year it is that I really don’t have a clue. But one thing I do know, God will not just do it all for us, we need to take the step of accepting His help. I do not know what that might look like for other people, but for me it was getting others in on my own struggles, having accountability, maybe thats what others are needing. Maybe it is something else, I promise God has set the door open wide for us all and now we must walk through it. Something that was said in church here the other day is bouncing through my mind, we must position ourselves to be healed, to accept what God is doing. This is a two way dance, not a spectator sport. We must be involved, and when we refuse to do something we are actively choosing to walk the other way. Yes, it can be hard; No, I don’t know the specifics of every person out there; Yes, it is something I did for a long time; and no, I would not trade away any bit of pain and discomfort that came with the process. It is so worth it.
If you can sense God calling you to a new way of being, do not ignore it! My pleading heart hopes that you would embrace it! Yes it will be uncomfortable; No, it is not going to be the easy way. The easy way is the way of the world, not of God. God’s way is more beneficial than any other out there. When you walk in His way, no matter how much it may seem so, you will NEVER walk alone. Don’t let ignorance and pride keep you from being the best possible you that you could ever be. Sin can be fun, easy, no big deal right? Wrong. Is that the argument you would try and make to God if you died in the next moment and had to answer for yourself? None of us are promised a tomorrow on this earth as we are, I do not know when my time in the flesh will end, the thing is to be ready all the time! Please hear me, I am so far from anything close to perfection, I have so far to go, but these are things God has put on my heart and maybe it is so that someone else can glean from it.
Please pray for a continued sense of need, for a sustained desire to learn and grow and be broken and remade in this place, in this time and for the rest of my life on earth, no matter how long or short it may be. I pray for those of you who are getting something out of words that are not mine. There is nothing I could ever say to make a difference in anyones life, but if God sees fit to use me to say something to another then Praise Him for it! The desire to change comes from within each of us, no amount of fancy words can make that choice for us, I pray that some reading - and those not reading - would be drawn to make that change. If there is one other thing I have been moved by, it is the assurance so many people have of the fact that God truly answers prayers. God is not distant and still, He is here, among us in the Spirit waiting for us to respond and to seek Him. He will make a difference in your life, just give Him the chance.
“And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ - to the glory and praise of God.”
- Philippians 1:9-11
